PROGRESS …

Blistering Blue Bloody Blazes …

November 7, 2011

A pox on all Blister packs!

“The deepest level of Hell,” said Captain Jack Sparrow conversationally, “is reserved for mutineers.” But not if I had my way. I’d reserve the deepest hottest darkest nastiest level of Hell for the guy (okay, for the Committee) (no one man could be that fiendish) who invented the Blister Pack.

Time is at a premium. Too far south of the maturity Equator I just don’t have time to spare decoding blistapaks. I know there has to be a quick and simple (painless too, do I dare mention that?) method of getting into them but it eludes me. I’m sure that out there in the world there must be billions of folks who get home with their purchase, hold them up to the light, say the magic words, give a quick flick of the wrist and voila! there is your pair of scissors, paint brush, tape, mp3 player or whatever. I’ll bet that they flip the detritus over their shoulders without even looking and the wreckage goes right into the bin, too.

I’ve tried everything from razors to scissors to shears to electric hedge-cutters; from putting the package into the vise out in my workshop and twisting with all the demented fury that only desperation can trigger; and still nothing. The package just laughs and twists along with me until I have a multi-hued plastic pretzel complete with snapped off goods inside and still no way in to get them out. They should build warships out of this stuff. Main battle tanks and hold the Chobham, skyscrapers, earthquake-proofing …

After this ... Fort Knox, Plaaaay Doh!

Progress … would be a pocket-sized  Blista-Pak opener!

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